Yo hiya ya'll!!!
Another day in. Gobling report number #2. Standby.
I decided to make another entry today at night (0:30). Once again, Im not sober... This is really overwhelming me. Today was unevenftul. I had to work from the office today. The AC was fixed so I was actually freezing in there. My ex was there too and she of course had to break no-contact again. She was texting me on companies Teams. ugh that bitch.... After I got back? Tbh I think I was playing games, and I got high during that and here I am. Im making new friends at work and they wanna help me not to get fired. Hell yeah!! Shout out to Eve, Daria, Adrian, Max and many others!!! Holy shit thats actually a lot and many more. Yeah they made it way better. Im not handling the withdrawal from SSRI too well. In fact I wanted to cry the whole day at work. I am really struggling mentally. I started spending money on useless shit and I got worse drugs apart from weed. Egh Im disgusting....
My brain is just a fuzz now, I dont remember anything. I dont know who I am. I signed for more overtime at work, gotta get that cash somehow. Besides... I dont really have a social life currently ;((
I feel loneliness slowly swallowing me, This train is experiencing some incredible turbulences and seems to be close to derailing. I really need some help, dont I? But at the same time - I got some plans with people from the office - we will be playing "Ready or Not" together! So I will get to know them outside of work. And also on Friday I will visit my old friend (weve known each other for 7 years now) she is a joyful and sincere person, so shout out to "Berry" (dont wanna spoil too much names). She will teach me hand sewing and we will be making patches. She will probably also teach me how to crochet!! And for many years, even when we had longer breaks. She still respects me and likes me the same.
I will do my best to be a better person
Gobling report of 2nd of July - over and out! Stay safe everyone. I love you all